“Republican Logic – A (Scary) Word(s) Game!”
American Public (AP): There was another school shooting.
Republican Paty (GOP): Let’s put people with GUNS in schools to protect people in schools from other people with GUNS in schools!
AP: Now the school is on fire.
GOP: Let’s use this can of GASOLINE to put it out!
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AP: Capitalism disproportionately benefits the wealthy and powerful.
GOP: Well, there are winners and losers in life.
AP: Most of those “winners” were born into positions of wealth and power, rather than attaining them on their own.
GOP: Well, there are winners and losers in life.
AP: You just said that.
GOP: Well, there are winners and losers in life.
AP: Are you feeling okay?
GOP: I feel great, LOSER!
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GOP: Radical socialist Dr. Abdul El-Sayed just won the Michigan Senate Primary race!
AP: Good.
GOP: What do you mean, “good?” Are you a radical socialist?!
AP: No. But I’m tired of politics as usual. Also, Abdul El-Sayed is a progressive. He isn’t even a member of the Democratic Socialists of America.
GOP: There’s a “Radical Socialists of America” party?!
AP: No. It’s a two-party system. Democratic socialism is a political belief system. Nothing more—
GOP: RADICAL SOCIALIST!
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AP: Donald Trump isn’t doing anything but building tributes to himself and raking in cash for his rich friends, his family, and himself.
GOP: He’s a master deal-maker!
AP: He’s the president. He’s using his office to broker these deals. He’s doing it in full view of the public and in open violation of the Emoluments Clauses of the U.S. Constitution.
GOP: BUILD THE BALLROOM! BUILD THE ARCH! REPAINT THE REFLECTING POOL!
AP: Have you forgotten about “THE WALL?”
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AP: This wildfire smoke is deeply concerning.
GOP: Let’s slap additional tariffs on Canada!
AP: How will that help? The issue is the climate crisis--
GOP: TARIFFS!
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AP: Trickle-down economics is a lie. Increased gains for the one percent don’t do anything to benefit the other ninety-nine percent.
GOP: I’m not going to apologize for being affluent!
AP: No one is asking you to do that. We’re just pointing out a systemic inequality—
GOP: RADICAL SOCIALIST!
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AP: Congress finally did something right by passing that housing bill.
GOP: President Trump shouldn’t sign it until Congress passes the SAVE Act!
AP: Why?
GOP: To combat the scourge of voter fraud!
AP: Where’s your evidence?
GOP: The 2020 Presidential Election!
AP: You still haven’t cited any evidence supporting that. Also, Trump won in 2024--
GOP: PASS THE SAVE ACT!
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GOP: President Trump is brokering a deal that will open the Strait of Hormuz!
AP: You mean the one that was open and operational before Trump started a war with Iran?
GOP: It was a necessary trade-off. Now Iran will never have a nuclear weapon!
AP: We had that ensured already with the Joint Comprehensive Plan of Action. It was enacted without a single shot fired. It only failed because Trump withdrew us from it. And he only did that because it was brokered under the Obama Administration---
GOP: RADICAL SOCIALIST!
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AP: Our stockpiles of missiles are running low.
GOP: All part of the plan!
AP: But how are we supposed to fight one war and support another if we don’t have any heavy weaponry to do it with? Also, what plan? Trump clearly has no idea how to get us out of Iran---
GOP: TRUMP 2028!
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AP: This dialogue is going nowhere.
GOP: If you can’t beat us, join us!
AP: But we can beat you. We have beaten you. We probably will beat you again in the midterms. You can’t just dismiss everything with scary words in all caps like—
GOP: RADICAL SOCIALIST!